Here’s a typical response to my “learn to relax” sales pitch:
“OK fascinating: we can’t count and recite the alphabet simultaneously – and there’s a part of each of us that’s bulletproof – that literally never changes – yet without which we wouldn’t know we were here. But – how does that help me!?”
Aside from consciousness being the reason that we know we’re alive….by learning to control our mind, we can experience consciousness itself. While it generally takes awhile become enlightened, the more often and closer we draw towards the still essence of who we are by meditating, the more we appreciate its healing, transformative affects.
If any of these sound familiar:
- “I can’t sleep.”
- “I’m stressed out.”
- “I’m nervous.”
- “I’m crazy busy.”
- “I’m a mess.”
- “I haven’t got a clue.”
- “I can’t stop [ ].”
MEDITATE! Here’s how:
It’s simple; it just takes practice! Start by allowing yourself five minutes a day to relax, recharge and reboot:
- Find a comfortable spot to sit, preferably calmly lit and airy; it should feel welcoming and pleasant;
- Light a candle and place it at arms-length in front of you;
- Sit upright though relaxed;
- Close your eyes almost all the way – so you just see the glint of the burning candle at the bottom of your normal field of vision;
- Chin back ever-so slightly and imagine you’re looking out at the horizon – and smile!
- Set a timer for however long you have;
- Scan and relax your body without compromising your posture;
- When you’re settled, focus all of your attention on one thing for the next few minutes. You’re training your mind to think what YOU want it to! When you find it wandering off, lovingly bring it back. It’s like doing a few sets of slow, purposeful curls for your biceps – but this requires mental rather than physical effort! If you’re a dog owner, this is part where you’re trying to get your mind to “sit” – “stay” comes with practice!
WHAT TO FOCUS ON:
Raw beginners: “A”,”B”,”C” (each letter represents an individual thought because you literally can’t think/say “A” and “B” simultaneously in your conscious mind):
Imagine you’re trying to slow things down internally; as if you’re trying to synchronize your breath, pulse and rate of thought (“A”,”B”,”C” is just a string of three individual thoughts – think/say them slower to slow down the rate at which your conscious mind thinks). Focus all your attention on each letter as you think/say it in your mind (visualization helps). When you get to “X”…”Y”…”Z”, go backwards: “Y”… “X”…”W”, etc.
Later: Once you have a sense of control, try focusing on something more subtle: your breath; specifically, breath-by-breath pay attention to each aspect of the three-part cycle: inhalation – brief pause – exhalation – brief pause – inhalation, etc. Find a rhythm, perhaps use 4-count inhalations and exhalations so they’re about the same duration – and just notice the brief pause in between. Tip: “No words!”; if you hear words, you’re “in your head” or distracted, rather than mindfully watching your breath.
The experience is almost always calming and soothing, and the benefits carry over into the rest of your day. May your practice always be so!
Try it and let me know what you think! Allan
